“Yo where’d you get those fly-ass jeans at?
“I got it at Ross”
“Where’d you get tha luggage at, son?”
“I got it AT ROSS!”

One of my friends summed it up best:

Finally, a rap song that’s aboutsaving money!

So thank you, Abraham Linkin. Thank you for letting us be cool while saving money.

(And I love buying my pans at Ross).

Damn this is getting serious!

My jaw dropped-it actually dropped, right off of my face, into my coffee, and burned- from the utter shamless self-promotion and shallowness of this post on the Wired news page.

http://www.wired.com/dangerroom/2010/06/how-free-explains-israels-flotilla-fiasco/

I just don’t know where to start. The shameless plugging of the editor’s book, the idiotic (and overused anyway) usage of FAIL in the headline, the shocking lack of attention tot he details of the incident, the pandering nature of the artiicle to self-styles geeks, etc, etc. Wired has been bugging me with this sort of style for a long while now, yet this takes the cake. Usually their lazy journalism and cringe-inducing championing of “Geekdom” as a lifestyle and futurist BS just makes me want to bang my head against my desk, but this latest article actually makes me want to slap the writer in the face.

Some samples, I suppose, are in order.

To start with:

The organizers of the “Free Gaza” flotilla spent almost nothing on their campaign. The government of Israel poured millions into its botched raid on the ships — and now is in a worse position than when the flotilla launched. How did it happen? Part of the problem is that the Israeli government never bothered to read WIRED.

And then:

It was all so utterly predictable. In his book Free, WIRED editor Chris Anderson lays out a new media model that foreshadowed the flotilla meltdown.

And on and on the essay goes, glossing over the loss of life and seriousness of the situation to present us with more insight into how our digital lifestyle made this news visible to the world. Fair enough, but it’s done is such a hamfisted, self-congratulatory manner it makes me want to retch.

And…the conclusion to this mess?

While Israel is justifiably known as the world’s “Start-up Nation” for its technological dynamism and entrepreneurship, we are being beaten hands down on the PR uses of this new technology. We may be a start up nation, but we are bricks and mortar communicators. Our adversaries have cntrl-alt-del…

Reactions to some twitter people were as follows:

@dropkickpikachu good lord tell me that’s a satirical retweet please god

@shoegays The Gaza Flotilla massacre as told by Cory Doctorow

@lildanzig jesus christ that is AWFUL shit right there

@mydxmproblem lmao that’s deplorable

@shoegays “epic fail. nuke Israel from orbit with fire goonsire.” ~ wired

@leducviolet are u fucjikign kidding me???

@dropkickpikachu i want to kill myself

If nothing else I was shocked by the poor taste in which this article was written and how the tone ends up trivializing the whole affair. And I’m a fucking troll for God’s sake.

But wait, there more! Look what’s coming up, via @robbercat!

Watch as excited people run up and down a pool filled with corn starch and water, screaming in Spanish and then standing still, sinking into the weird fluid, to cheers and ovations. It makes you want to fill your own pool with a cement truck full of corn starch.

Remember Tom Green? No? yes? he has a Twitter Account now, I guess. Yay?

Any way, here is a scene from his masterwork of unwatchableness, Freddy Got Fingered, and it is actually awesome! it also includes Rip Torn which always helps. I must warn you, it is the *only* awesome scene in the whole movie. So I just saved you a couple of hours!

It’s The Misfits AND vintage SciFi/horror. What more could you possibly ask for? (That’s a rhetorical question, you fuck).

My boy Clegg in a rap battle with Cameron and Brown for top Britrap honors, happy election day Britain!